Quality Wooden Toys
Quality Wooden Toys
There is no doubt that 2020 and 2021 have been tough years for all of us. Even though New Zealand was less affected by COVID-19 than other countries it still has taken its toll on our community physically, financially, emotionally, and mentally. This effect has not only been felt by the adults, but also by our children.
There are many studies that have found that when you build your resilience you have a reduced risk for depression, anxiety, and PSD. You will also improve your longevity, happiness, and satisfaction in life.
In his TED talk, author and psychologist, Guy Winch examines the disparity between the priority that we place on caring for ourselves physically vs how we care for ourselves emotionally. He relates a story of how he observed a five-year-old brushing his teeth and slipping and scraping his leg. The boy then without asking for assistance reached into the medicine cabinet and grabbed a plaster and covered the wound.
He reflected on how we teach children to take care of themselves physically. However, we do not place the same emphasis on teaching children to care for themselves physiologically.
I am a firm believer that if we would like to shift this mindset for future generations, then we need to start teaching our children emotional literacy from a young age.
Nathan Wallis, a neuroscience educator, speaks about the significance of the dyad relationship between the infant and the most significant adult in their lives.
This is the first relationship the infant has with their primary carer. This relationship is crucially important in supporting a baby to develop a healthy, complex brain. The dyad is where the infant learns about self-regulation, trust and the world around them. The quality of the learning and the brain connections the infant forms are dependent on how attuned the adult is to the infant and their needs.
Our children are constantly taking in our words, our actions and our emotional reactions. We are the windows from which our children view the world and therefore the quality of role-modelling is extremely powerful.
"Our children are learning from us through our every word and action, about love, relationships, empathy, generosity, gratitude, patience, tolerance, kindness, honesty and respect. Most profoundly they are learning about themselves, their abilities, their worth and their place in our hearts and in the world."
- Janet Lansbury, Elevating Child Care
Professor John Gottmann, an American emotional intelligence researcher, discovered the following styles of emotional parenting through his work:
Professor Gottmann’s, research found that adults were the most likely to respond to children’s emotions in the style in which they were parented. He also found that when children’s emotions were responded to in the Emotions Coaching parenting style, it resulted in the following benefits for the child’s development:
You may have read the above list of emotional parenting styles and despaired that you have somehow failed as a parent. I hear you, when I first learned about Emotions Coaching, I felt the same way. The truth is that we are all doing the best we can with what we have, and children are remarkably resilient.
The good news is that like any skill, Emotions Coaching is a have five distinct steps that we all can learn. It is also worth noting that we only need to Emotions Coach our children forty per cent of the time to be effective.
Remember when we tune into our children’s emotions at the lower frequency emotions and behaviours don’t need to escalate.
If your child chooses problem-solving, some of the things you may want to talk through with them:
"Telling a child that something that matters to them isn’t important doesn’t convince them that it doesn’t matter. It just convinces them that it doesn’t matter to you, it often makes them feel that they don’t matter, either. Remember, caring about the little things that matters to little people creates big connections."
- L.R. Knost
Our products that will help kids to learn about emotions: